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March ’70

Our magnificent Cathedral is finally finished. It’s my understanding that the Ruskies hold the record for most vodka drunk, however embarrassingly enough their record is higher than our record for most rum drunk. I’m hoping that building this Cathedral right on the other side of the distillery will allow us to surpass their considerable achievement.

January ’71

Pollution is starting to be a major problem, however the construction of three strategically located garbage dumps should help curb the destruction.

January ’72

Another election is coming up, and I am of course still monstrously popular with the people. I’ll give a speech, because everyone loves speeches.

April ’72

The Zoo is finally finished, and with it we are one step closer to achieving the world record for having most exciting animal? I’m not sure, I’m not really an animal person so I kind of just smiled and nodded and signed all the relevant paperwork on this one. They tell me though we’ve had ample coverage and the bank account reflects it. Also, apparently there’s a record for having the most records! Achieving that would surely garner some publicity allowing me to further pad my Swiss account.

January ’73

Construction of our first Army Base is complete, and the Armory is nearly done. With all the attention we are getting on the national scene due to our record number of records achieved in record time it’s a miracle we haven’t been attacked yet. If there was a record for longest time without being attacked (or without a military force) we’d probably have it, but there’s not so instead Penultimo has a scheme to hire some mercenaries to stage an attack and get us a record that way… However I know Penultimo, and there is any chance it’ll end up being a real attack, so I’m going to make sure we have a proper military before beginning the attack.

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